At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
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That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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