ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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