hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize