He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize