oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
