Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize