The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
