No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
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