i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
last night I used snow as a chaser
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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