Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
