So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
