Banned from zoo.
Again?
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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