Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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