either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
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