ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Randomize