I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
