she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
