I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
