Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
