i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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