Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
This is the high leading the old right now
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize