went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Randomize
