You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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