his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
