i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
