she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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