Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
