come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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