He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
The air taste purple.
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