My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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