I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
