hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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