i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
