we're blogging at a bar
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
