Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
