I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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