I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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