I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
We need to rekindle our bromance
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
