Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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