Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.