its not stalking. its research.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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