sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I love having hate sex.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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