I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I have post one night stand depression
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
