Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Michael Bay diarrhea
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
