umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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