Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize