yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
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