Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Terrible idea I love it
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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