I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize