Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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